Thanks For Ruining My Day.

There's a giant man hole in the intersection where I am staying in Toronto and I briefly thought about jumping in it after the day I had. Terrible, terrible day. I don't think it helped much that I watched The Notebook before going to bed last night then subsequently saw a Jenny Craig commercial which reminded me that

a) I should probably swing by the pet store on my way home to my parents on Wednesday and pick up about 9 cats as I will die a spinster in their basement.
AND
b) I should invest in a bunch of elastic waist pants as my ass is like a Chia pet. It just keeps growing. "Ch-Ch-Ch-Chia."(I know you all said that in your head)

This morning when I woke up and looked in the mirror I realized that I am a cross between Kirsty Ally and Courtney Love. Not feeling at my best, on my way to an interview, some douche bag yelled obscenities out of  his truck window at me and all I could do was yet again, burst into tears. I am so mad at myself for not telling him I hope his penis spontaneously combusts and that he gets herpes of the face.

Generally speaking, I can only express my opinion to douche bags and bitches out loud in public during the holiday season in mall parking lots. That's really the only time that I scream obscenities at strangers. In most seasons I just verbally assult people in my head (or via email) and smile at them.

Anyway, I am kinda glad that my parents didn't raise me to be an asshole. At least not publicly.

Must go. Into my second hour of Intervention.

Smooches,
Nanners