Excuse Me...You Need to Pay for That.

Ever have one of those mornings when you wake up, realize that you don't have anything to eat for breakfast but toothpaste, then you decide to go for a walk and step in vomit while wearing flip flops? Well I just had one of those mornings.

To add to my excitement, I realized that I lost my back-up sunglasses (and I am highly concerned about my squinting causing wrinkles) so I decided to run across the street (braless) to Winners to get another cheap pair. To my amusement as soon as I walk in, about 6 security guards are tackling a middle aged man in a fedora to the ground and detaining him for shoplifting. I stopped and stared long enough to see that it looked like a can of hairspray and to update my facebook status on my phone about this experience.

In case you are interested, I ended up getting a pair of cheap sunglasses after consulting 2 strangers if my head was too big for them. Most people have the problem that sunglasses look to big on them but in the words of my mother; "You had a big head at birth and it just kept growing.") Well I am sure she is pleased to see that the rest of me has grown into my giant head. Thanks for the complex Mom.

So me and my oversized head and now newly protected eyes took a walk down to Dundas square. I don't know why I venture into places like this as I know that insane people are naturally drawn to me (keep your comments to yourself) So I was standing outside H&M looking for the liquor store when a young gentleman approached me and quickly asked me in a very quiet voice "do you need some coke?" I politely replied "No thanks, but thanks anyway,"

and continued to search for the liquor store. BUT THEN. To my disbelief, just outside of H&M ANOTHER person, this time a woman, got busted by security guards for shoplifting.

I thought about it on the subway home, if I were going to shoplift, I wouldn't pick H&M or Winners...I would choose something more high scale like Gucci or Prada. I would rather go down in a blaze of glory for some quality shit.

It's like I was living in an episode of cops this morning.

Smooches,

Nanners