Ummm....it's approximately 5:15am as I am typing this on Sunday morning. For those of you who know me, and know my battle with my REM cycle and my bed you will not question why I am awake at this ungodly hour when I don't have to be.
I am looking around my room looking for something to do, but seeing as how it is the size of a bird cage, I don't have too many options. Phoning a friend right now is not really an option either. Since I have been awake since 3:30 I have written two wedding speeches, one for a wedding that I am in and one for a friend who's in a wedding. Most people dread doing speeches or public speaking but I love it if my face hasn't broken out and my outfit is to my liking.
In between my speech writing, I have had the opportunity to flip through what seems like an endless abundance of channels. I really have to give credit to quasi-celebrities for participating to be in late night info-mercials for food processors. Mr. T is really making a comeback.
It's also pretty amazing to see how many people in the U.S are now self proclaimed millionaires and made $45,000 in one month after reading a book on real estate by some Joe Blow from Delaware.
My favourite are all the infomercials for fat people. WOW. The results are amazing! "I lost 24lbs in 12 days! All you have to do is do a shot of this juice and take 3 pills in the morning, 6 pills at lunch and you can even skip dinner!"
In my late night t.v endeavours, I have also noticed that those Latins on the TLN channel really like to go at it. There is porn on for those of you interested, you may not be able to understand it because it's in Spanish, but I think most people watch for the visual stimulation. In fact a lot of the women in the porn look like the flight attendants on Air Mexicana. BTW...If you are ever at the airport look for their ticket booth. It looks like a booth set up at a grade 8 science fair run by a bunch of latin hookers.
There are also a lot of Walmart commercials on at the moment. Man, I really appreciate that store. Someone once told me that there are no guarentees in life but I can assure you there are if you walk into Walmart.
1. I will not be greeted by the Walmart Greeter
2. There will be someone in there that looks worse than me.
Anyway, I must end this abruptly and randomly as my retinas are burning and the taste in my mouth requires immediate Scope action.
Peace Out.
Nanners
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